Respect Earned in 6 Steps


Respect is a feeling that many wish to have in their lives. Many people have several acquaintances in their lives but it is common for one to know many but be truly respected by few. Respect is always earned and very rarely given away for free. It is almost as though one only respects another when they notice actions that demand respect. This blog serves as a guide to earn that respect and to gain that feeling that others embrace and admire you as a person.

  1. Get Your Work Done Without Complaining – There will always be work that has to be done until the day that we die. There are tasks that we must complete every day that are less than desirable activities. Every day will have hassles that we have to deal with that we did not predict. All of these factors just go to show that there will always be something to complain about every day. The reality is that everybody’s life is like this. While complaining about your life, people may nod, agree and sometimes even laugh but it is not the gateway for earning respect. The only thing that complaining indicates to others is a negative attitude about daily events that happen regularly. Chances are if you are complaining today, you will be complaining on other days. Everybody has problems; they do not need to be burdened with all the problems in another person’s life as well.
  2. Do Not Make Fun of Others – Having fun at someone else’s expense is something that is fun purely in the moment for the person picking on the other. In that moment of time, it is possible that someone is made miserable in order for others to laugh at them. The person leading this offense on another gets joy of others laughing at their jokes but this laughing is only what is seen on the surface. After others leave the situation and process the event, they will realize that the person who led the attack is someone to keep their eyes on. After all, if they are willing to make fun of one person, they are more than likely willing to make fun of another under the right circumstances. It could be anybody if it they are in the wrong place at the wrong time. Crushing another’s confidence is not looked at favorably by others and it sure is no way to gain respect from others. Rather it is a way to create contempt in others which will have the opposite effect of earning respect.
  3. Be Assertive – Being assertive means making sure that your needs are met and then helping others to meet their needs. When people take notice that all of your needs are met, it conveys a sense of self-respect. Others must see that you respect yourself before they will give their respect to you. Upon seeing that you also help others when your needs have been met, a message of kindness and helpfulness will be associated with your name. It is respectable to take care of yourself; it demands respect when you help others succeed while still retaining the ability to make sure all of your needs are met. Being assertive has been linked to having a stronger immune system and lower stress levels. It is a win all around.
  4. Do Not Put a Vital Importance on Winning – Many people live for the thrill of competition and for the thrill of winning. While there is nothing wrong with healthy competition, there is a problem with being obsessed with winning. Placing too much of an emphasis on winning can cause one to overlook important details of a situation because of seeing only the end result of winning. Placing winning as top priority can often lead to childish expressions of anger when coming in any place but 1st. These little temper tantrums are not appealing to people and do not command respect. Putting too much importance in winning can cause someone to win more often but it also can cause them to burn potentially important bridges along the way.
  5. Take Responsibility for Your Thoughts and Actions – There are many people who have no problem sharing what is on their mind. They may rattle off an inappropriate comment or make an excuse for why something did not get done and expect others to relate. Making excuses for not doing something many times is just avoiding taking responsibility for the job that was not completed. There are a ton of people who that can lie and get away with something that they did wrong but it is an honorable action when someone confesses to something they could have easily gotten away with, maybe without even lying at all. When someone sees another taking responsibility for what they say and do, they see evidence of an honest and truthful person.  This is a respected quality that people can openly see.
  6. Do Not Allow Yourself to Become Argumentative – Many people have many things to say sometimes they want to say it now, regardless of what others think about the topic. When strongly opinionated views are expressed, they are many times met with an opposition pointing out a potential flaw. When people feel their views are being questioned, they get defensive and a situation can escalate quickly to words of anger. Words of anger are very ineffective at getting the message across that we truly want to communicate. This is because of the subconscious tone that comes along with those words. Someone can say “have a nice day” in a soft and gentle voice and someone would take that as a nice comment. The same phrase can be used with a high-volume forceful voice to make the message sound insincere. It is sometimes best to just agree to disagree. Breaking harmony within a situation just to prove your point does not convey a person who is commanding respect. One who can diffuse a situation with a simple agreement of not agreeing is seen as a person who is tactful and respectful.

Integrating these steps into your life may not show results right away but this is a promise; if you stick to these guidelines for an extended period of time, dividends are right around the corner and you will receive them for your efforts. Over time, people will lose their old image of you and redefine you by the new image you convey for a long period of time. It is a lot of work to integrate these steps into your life, but don’t the most important things in life usually require at least a decent amount of work?

“We are the Young Life Perception”

Be sure to check out our podcast at www.younglifeperception.com

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