Everybody Knows of Somebody They Just Can’t Stand
It doesn’t matter how charming somebody’s personality comes off as because there will always be some people that person just can’t seem to get along with. It’s almost as though just the presence of some people is enough to drive us crazy for seemingly no reason at all. For many people this is an indicator that the person in question should just be kept at a distance instead of trying to get to know them.
As humans we have a system of judging people that at first relies on the first impression that someone gives off. Everybody has to start developing a mental image of a person before they are able to get to know them better. The beginning of this process happens in the first 5 to 10 seconds of meeting someone. In many cases a bad first impression scares off potential friends but humans are imperfect creatures. This means that this first-impression method is sometimes misread discouraging a relationship where each partner has valuable advice for the other.
What is Valuable Knowledge Anyway?
Many people would agree that valuable knowledge is anything that can help them lead a more fulfilling and beneficial life. A big problem that we face is that most people believe themselves to be intelligent, even if their IQ is below 50. This “intelligent” persona that people create leads them to believe that they are strong at providing accurate knowledge, even if this knowledge is in an area they are unfamiliar with.
As people grow older they run into more and more of this “seemingly” valuable knowledge just to find out that its not even valid. With age comes cautiousness in believing the words of others. Everybody at one time or another has been the recipient of faulty facts and for many its natural to avoid making the same mistake more than once. This knowledge I am referring to however goes DEEPER than just verbal language.
Differences between People Create Stronger Relationships
DIFFERENCES in people are the GREATEST sources of valuable knowledge. Many times people will write off the idea of getting to know someone because they are too different. Differences are what make humans operate well as a team. Nobody has the capacity to be perfect therefore they will thrive in certain areas of life and be weak in others. Our weaknesses can always be bridged by a person who is different with their greatest strength being in the area where we are lacking.
Strengths of those who are different are often hard to recognize at first. The quantity of differences alone can make it hard to accept someone else because there is a natural human fear of the unknown. People can be fantastic but they can also be devious, sneaky and manipulative. Many people guard themselves against these bad qualities simply by rejecting those who are different. While keeping themselves in their comfort zone may FEEL better, they ARE cutting off their own personal growth by isolating themselves from the various strengths of others with different personality types.
Common Sources of Misunderstanding
These are by no means the only examples that pertain to misunderstandings but I feel that they will greatly contribute to the understanding of this idea. The first source of misunderstanding is simply the differences in people who are extraverted vs. those who are introverted. A couple reasons this presents a source for misunderstanding is that extraverted people need to hear praise for their good work while many introverts do not care for social niceties such as compliments that make others feel good. Introverted people also like to take understanding to great depth in a few subjects while extraverted people many times will have a shallow understanding of many things.
There is also the difference between those who rely on their five senses to understand the world and those who use their imagination to connect dots to understand the world. People who use their five senses are very good at picking up detail and using literal facts and concrete terms when explaining stories. People who would prefer to interpret the world using connections prefer to use abstract thoughts and ideas when explaining stories. The two approaches use very different language and are often a big source of miscommunication.
How to Overcome Negative Views of Others
The most important thing to remember is that EVERYBODY has something to teach you. Once this idea has been fully implemented into your thinking process, wisdom starts to form within your mind. Everybody who is different has a strength that you are lacking in. Every person that SEEMS unintelligent has something useful that you do not know.
Many people strive to be independent but the true fact is we are all inter-dependent.
That is we depend on people to provide electricity, fresh water, and trash removal and even to provide our food for us. We use money to buy all of these things but we depend on other people to provide those goods and services. Rejecting someone just because they are different is like telling the water company you do not want water because their prices are too high. You may end up saving some money but in the end the cost will ultimately be higher because of your refusal to act like the inter-dependent species that we have become.
Go out this week and take a different angle when looking at someone that you don’t really care for. Observe what strengths they have and what you could learn from them. Success is achieved through our experiments and in our success labs we study people. Learning to see the strengths of others is your key to finding valuable knowledge within people which they will not even necessarily have to share with you. When you unlock this ability, enjoy your start to unlimited growth.
“We are the Young Life Perception”